Please hear me. And hear me clearly. This is a true story.
On September 19, 2018 it happened. It was an unannounced yet not an unwanted confirmation. It was a pursuit and capture between predator and prey. It was a confirmation that another chapter was about to end, yet the story was to continue. Where there was a question mark, there were now declarative statements that would punctuate and pierce a questioning heart that now would change life’s trajectory. Peace if you will.
Earlier on the same day, in the early morning after the prayer call, it wandered through her mind- Is there a point to any of this? I mean really, is there a point to any of this? When will this end? When will I transition to next? I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I want to genuinely say thank you, but yet when I look at around me, and where I am prevents me from saying such; when I know it should propel me to say such words. I know, I know it’s about what I don’t see, but right now….I see it and I see it ALL, AND I see it clearly. I hurt. I am depleted and I’m tired. I’m tired of going to bed tired, tossing and turning, waking up crying and dreading the day. I’m tired of not having joy!!! Life is not supposed to be like this. There has to be some rationale behind it all. I am struggling in my unseen belief that GOD is for me, with me, and are protecting me. Especially protecting me. I feel like I’m in a fight for something beyond my life.
As I stepped out of my office for a brief lunch getaway to clear my head and dry more tears in peace without questions….it happened. As soon as I opened my car door, my phone auto synched to my car and began searching for notifications and music to be displayed and blast across the speakers. My mind had begun to wander off, and another tear felt that he had been summoned and began to fall….but I was tired of crying and just wanted it all to stop. My heart began to pick up the pace, and began to race to an unannounced finished line, yet I welcomed it. But not quite.
A song began to play that I had not heard in oh so long. A song that I had absolutely fallen in love with a while ago, but had forgotten about it. As the song began to play I felt a peace and a joy like never before. It felt like I was being cradled. I was warm…inviting…it was safety…..it was place I wanted to build a home and stay….. It felt like home. As the song began to come to an end…I scrambled to hit the back arrow on my car’s keyboard, however it was too late and another song began to play. Well I did what any self respectable Anthony Hamilton fan would do, I pulled over to the nearest parking lot to find my phone so it could go back to the song and of course I could put it on repeat so I could hear it again and again for the rest of the day. Something about the words spoke to me. As I dug through my oversize purse to find the actual phone, I just thought about the words of the song, and my mood changed. Somehow, somewhere in the lyrics blaring across the speakers, there was a shift both in and through me. That something took away my tears and stilled my heart. Unbeknownst to me, my tears had rollbacked just a little and had been replaced. My car now smelled of a soft honey sable….the name of the song you ask…of course, I’m happy you ask, it’s…my absolute favorite…. The Point of it All….but hold up…I can’t find the song on the playlist. So I searched in my phone’s song library and only 2 song with Anthony Hamilton were there and they are both duets with Lelah James and J Moss. I sat in that parking lot bewildered and searching for over 20 minutes. The song was NOT on my actual phone. AT ALL. The song was NOT ON MY PHONE. Talk about a Jesus take the wheel moment. I wanted to get out of my car and walk back to work because this could not be real. That song played. I heard the words. It penetrated my heart. Something just happened. The song played. There were so many questions, yet there was one answer I could not deny. That answer was peace. The answer was and is, that He Loves me. it arrested and enveloped me like something indescribable. Something happened….the Hound of Heaven pursued and captured tears, arrested feelings of depression and sentenced it to a permanent death, grave and hell. It was the Hound of Heaven that sent a literal love song to me. Yes me!!! And that is the story I will tell for the rest of my days.
And just so that we are clear when you rethink the words of the song. The fault was all mine. It was me who went radio silent on Him. It me who asked for just a little time out. It was me who asked for a time out or break in the relationship.
So, I say this all to say that He is the God who Sees, and the God who hears even your slightest whimpers. He is the God that chases and pursues you even to the end of the earth. He is the God that gives grace and mercy every moment he decides that there is destiny and purpose for your life. He is that GOD!! He is the God that cares, and the God loves you out of a depth you have yet to fully comprehend. He is the God that gracefully breaks and mold you into his good purpose and prepares you for his good works that He will complete in and through you. He is that GOD!!! So the point of it all? The point of feeling, and every tear, the point of every breaking and every hurt, the point of every sunshine and every storm……is simply because He loves you too much to allow you to stay at a good place when best is around the way. The Point of it ALL is He simply…He LOVES US.
I can't stay away from you too long:
( I will never leave you or forsake)
Even if I do I'll always call:
( I will never leave you or forsake )
Checkin' on you make sure you're OK:
(Friends, family or just a kind stranger that ask that question, “How are you today” and they linger to get answer and not just walk away hurriedly.)
Be the one to brighten up your day, yeah yeah:
(The way the sun splashes against your skin, or unexpected something that makes the corners of your lips curl up…yep that’s HIM, the hound of heaven..pursuing you)
And the point of it all Is I love you, yeah You know I love you baby
My days seem long Whenever we're apart It's like someone has Thrown away my heart You're a major part of my life And no matter what the Storm may bring I'm fine with you
And the point of it all Is I love you And the reason for it all Is I love you
Oh I love Oh I love you (Oh I love you girl) Oh I love you girl, yeah
I can't stay (I can't stay away too long) I can't stay away from you baby (I can't stay away too long) Don't wanna be without you I need you (I can't stay away too long) O why don't you stay around for awhile (I can't…